Our Adoption Story, Part 1

When we started our adoption journey, I had myself convinced that we would only be waiting for a few months. After all, we were one of the youngest adoptive families. We were sure to be chosen quickly. I was quickly humbled when we waited months without so much as a peep from our agency. After only 7 months of waiting, we were matched for a baby girl, only to have that adoption fall through. At the time it was heartbreaking, and really it killed me for months after. Now I see that God had our little one waiting, and she just wasn't the one. He truly does have incredible plans for us even when it's hard to see.

Over the next year and a half or so, we were called four more times. In three of these cases, the birth mother ultimately chose another family. In one case, she chose to parent. Each call brought more hope (especially when the calls were coming more frequently), but each "no" made it feel like we would never bring home our little one. I never fully lost hope, but I certainly became extremely cautious with my emotions. I learned to build a wall to try not to get too invested in each potential match, and  I often failed. It's hard not to start dreaming of what could be. 

Then we got a request for our profile mid-October. We had recently received two other calls, so we were getting a bit worn out emotionally. We decided to keep things quiet this time. We figured this way we wouldn't be so focused on it while we waited for her decision, and it would be a pretty awesome surprise to be able to call our families and friends and tell them that we were chosen. 

A week passed and we hadn't heard anything (which was pretty consistent with past experiences). Our counselor texted to let us know that they hadn't heard a thing from the birth mother, so we should be prepared for her to parent. At that point we pretty much checked out. We had experienced two other cases in which the birth parents chose to parent, so we knew all too well that it was a strong possibility. So needless to say, I was completely shocked when I had a missed call and text from our counselor on November 1 saying to call her as soon as possible. We were in a match! Baby boy was due December 15 in central Illinois. 

We were still extremely cautious. Our agency was concerned about how long she had taken to choose a family, and she had changed her mind about wanting to meet us. She only wanted email contact for the time being. So we knew to be cautious. Within a few days, we received birthmom's email information, and we exchanged our first emails. Fortunately after just one email, she decided she wanted to meet us and wanted us to be at the hospital and bring baby home upon discharge. We were thrilled! This was a huge step. We knew to continue to be cautious, but we also knew that things were moving in the right direction. We would meet birthmom at the end of November. We knew that things would start to get pretty real at that point...